Scrambled eggs with red beans

Is that a sexy pile of scrambled eggs or what? It almost looks 3-D, it does.

Started soaking dried red beans last night with the intention of making ordinary beans with something something something in 'em. They looked great starting out.  I dumped them in the pressure cooker with smashed garlic, baking soda and herbs, and never let it get to the second notch of pressure. I was careful to keep the pressure on low, then set a timer for thirty minutes. The pot cooled down the slow way on its own without being rushed with a douse of cold water. That amounted to further cooking. When I opened the pot I could see the whole mass of beans had gone all 'splody and turned into a veritable mush. For some reason, the red beans also turned black. Blacker, even, than genuine black beans. I guess that's supposed to teach me to cook soaked beans under pressure for only five minutes. Or something.  

Anyway, it didn't look much different from anything I've had at least a hundred times in Mexico. OK FINE! Thirty times in Mexico. So I added Mexican-y type things ... epazote, chipotle in adobo, garlic, onion, canned tomato, and as you can plainly see, cilantro. Oh blast! I forgot cumin. This is better, actually, than any beans I have ever eaten. I hope I can duplicate this sometime. I also cooked them with baking soda. That with the epazote to counter the discomfort associated with beans and legumes. I'll tell ya * PARF * how that works out. Legumes. Ha ha ha. That's a funny word.  

Lately I've been making omelets the low-heat delicate way of gently pushing cooked curd toward the center of the pan, piling it up, then removing from heat before it entirely sets. So now I'm thinking, why bother with omelets, and just make scrambled eggs that way? So that's what I did. I like this. I'm going to host a brunch where I turn these out for everybody then let guests adorn them however they wish, shredded cheese, cream cheese, capers, diced onion, lox, diced ham, sautéed 'shrooms, whatev'. But every plate will come with Mexican BEAN SLUDGE!