Omelet with mushrooms and chives

I picked up this package of cheese with the intention of using it for cheese crackers but then this idea for an omelet came and I thought I would just nick off a piece for that. For this. 

When I opened the package and tasted it I was disappointed. This tastes and feels like Velveeta™ and I was expecting something normal. This product is bad. I hope it fails.

But it won't fail because the product fulfills a niche and that niche is a massive market of cheese under-appreciators and other sundry misanthropes. I don't know. What do I look like over here, a nutritional-sociologist?

All I know is this cheese sucks. But it will probably still work for crackers, being nearly burnt and everything, and it will still work for mac and cheese in conspiracy with other cheese. But still, please, I urge you, do not feed this to your children, or you'll set them back decades. Then they'll grow up and realize the short shrift you've given them which forces a review and a look back at the length of their checkered past with you, and every minor insult and offense will stand up in high relief and sharp contrast so they become convinced you never really did love them and only barely tolerated them as children, and this cheese is proof of all that. It's like I was saying to Dr. Fenberg last week, it's not like she ... 

okay, forget that last part. 

I did not show the ricotta. It is an unartistic unattractive carton that contains a white creamy substance. That's the ricotta oozing out under the mushroom. 

And now I must say a prayer of thanksgiving. Dear Lord, thank you for making me an ace omelet maker. Amen.