Crackers, olive oil, rosemary, Parmigiano

first tray

second tray

Went a little overboard there with the scoring.

I did not eat these. They're to be given away tomorrow. Here's the thing; I've been making a lot of crackers lately, honing my mad cracker-making skillz. I've searched all over the internet for ideas ... Okay FINE! ... I searched the first ten pages of images and clicked on a few. Saw that they all say pretty much the same thing, didn't see anything at all unusual. Doesn't anybody have any unique ideas out there? Come ON. So I thought maybe I could find a book, perhaps on Amazon. There is one, plus a bunch of things with "crackers" in the title that have nothing at all to do with proper crackers. The one book that fit the criterion was a thin little thing in paperback, available used, priced at nearly $20.00 plus shipping. Probably doesn't have any pictures and it doesn't even pop-up.

What?

That's too much. $23.00 ÷ 167 pages = 13.7¢ per page. This violates my used-book cost protocol that I just now made up.

Just buy it. No, don't buy it. Buy it. No, don't buy it. BUY IT! NO!

Back and forth I go like that.

I live two blocks from the main library. The book is not in their catalog so back and forth I go again with the buy/don't buy debate inside my head tearing me apart. I notice the bookseller at the top of the list is a few miles from where I live. I write to Dream Books:

Hello. I have a question about a paperback book you're offering for 19.00 (plus 4.00 shipping)

Crackers!: Fun, Easy Recipes for Baking Delicious Crackers, Linda Foust, Tony Hursch

ISBN-10 0936067160

ISBN-13 978-0936067162

167 pages.

I've been making a lot of delicious crackers and that caused me to become interested in looking at this book. I live 2 blocks south of Denver Public Library, but alas, they don't have this book in their catalog. I could order this easily enough online but $23.00 seems kind of steep for 167 pages. See the problem? A quick cost analysis shows nearly 14¢ a page for crackers. No offense intended, I do believe I can do as well online. It's a matter of curiosity as to the content of the book. My question is, would you consider selling the book for $10.00?

While you're deciding, would you like to see my crackers? Here, and here, and here and here

Thank you for considering my question.

Cheers,

Bo

Dream Books writes back:

Hi Bo,

Thank you for your email. We have a brick and mortar bookstore on 410 W. Hampden Ave. Englewood, CO 80110. This is about 10-15 minutes from your home. If you are interested in picking it up, I can take the shipping cost off. But if you are really interested in buying the book for $10, I will be willing to cut the $9 off for some of your homemade crackers (which looks delicious). Please let me know if any of my propositions sound interesting to you so I can arrange the book to be moved over from our warehouse to the bookstore or just shipped to your house.

Regards,
David Chung

Dream Books Company, LLC
P.O. Box 440530
Aurora, CO 80044-0530

Bless their hearts. It's on, Baby. I confirm:

David,

Yes. I'm am interested in visiting your bookstore in Englewood. I can visualize the storefront's location. I understand I am to bring crackers that I made myself in order to obtain a $9.00 discount. May I assume usual business hours? Please expect me tomorrow, Tuesday 5/24.

Cheers, Bo

The crackers I made yesterday will not do. Too overpoweringly seasoned for this sort of thing. Oh no, they will not do at all. Although I find them irresistibly delicious I'm aware not everybody will. Therefore I whipped out this batch which are more universally acceptable, and oh my GOD are they ever good, such a nice balance of flavors there

1 cup whole wheat flour

1 cup A/P flour

1/2 cup olive oil

2 teaspoons kosher salt

1 level teaspoon baking powder

2 oz. shredded Parmigiano (the real stuff)

1 cup water

Topping:

S/P ground together

rosemary crushed.

400℉ / 200℃ for thirteen minutes