Wakame salad

I'm glad I discovered this. 

By anime. Can you believe that? I think it was "One Punch." The hero just beat up a monster with one punch and then he goes, "I'm in the mood for a wakame salad." 

And then I recalled buying a bag of this stuff decades ago and being amazed and distressed by the way such a tiny amount grew to a whole bowlful. I didn't know what to do with it. I became emotionally distressed and threw away the whole bag after only testing it once. 

It reminded me of an unpleasant episode at age five involving Grape Nuts. I didn't understand why Grape Nuts came in such a small box. I thought it was like regular cereal so I poured a bowlful. Mum told me to stop. She said I couldn't eat that much. I did not realize Grape Nuts is like nuclear food. I don't even know what Grape Nuts is. I never touched it after this one episode. It left a lasting impression. Just recalling it makes me feel miserable. 

"I can too."

"No you can't." 

"Yes I can." 

"No you can not."

"Yes I can."

"I'm telling you that you cannot eat that much."

"Yes I can."

"Fine then. You're going to sit there until you're finished eating that whole bowl."

"Fine." 

I poured milk over the pile of Grape Nuts and it began to swell. I ate a few teaspoonfuls and it sat in my stomach like stones. There was no way my baby teeth could crunch through the whole bowl. But I tried. Crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch.

Rest. 

Crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch .

Rest.

Crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch. 

The bowl didn't diminish one single bit. This was going to take a long time. Mum was hovering observing progress as the Grape Nuts continued to swell.

Crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch. 

I was only 1/4 the way through. Grape Nuts were impossible. I was fighting a losing battle. What is it with these things anyway? I was going to be here a long time and my stomach cannot hold this growing bowl of cereal. I started to become sad.

Crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch. 

There was no way I could eat this crap. I broke down and cried. 

And cried and cried and cried. Oh, the horror of my fate.

"There, there, relax. Settle down. You don't have to eat the whole thing." 

Good. *ping* I ran out of there fast as I could.