Two fried eggs sunny side up, hamburger, cauliflower

Butter, from very special cows I'll have you know, living very pampered cow-lives in verdant fields and tended by humans with tender loving care.

Melted in the microwave. 

Water added. Cauliflower coated. Back into the microwave.

        "But what's in it, Bo?"

* cumin mostly

* hot chile flakes, just a trace

* garlic powder, just a smidgen

* commercial curry, just a teeny-tiny bit because it has like eight things in it.

* salt/pepper

Look, double tasking right here. Hamburger cooking in a pan while cauliflower is cooking by itself in the microwave. 

Not only that, two eggs frying in the same pan as the hamburger.

Cheese pulled but left out by executive decision during process.

See how flexible we are? 

My mom used to tell me all the time, "Your eyes are bigger than your stomach." 

That there's what you call a metaphor. 

Or something. 

At six years of age I was a literalist. This phrase confounded me. Even at six I believed my stomach was bigger than both eyes, but how was I to know. What did I look like, an anatomist? 

Those Pennsylvania Dutch have a million such phrases. 

Possibly a thousand such phrases. Maybe only a hundred. I don't know, alright, they have a lot of insane yet worldly yet common yet wise yet retarded phrases like that. My mom had my head swirling with insane phrases like "the walls have ears." 

They do not. Walls do not have ears. See what I had to put up with? See what I had to navigate as I figured out the world? At the same time being presented with religion profoundly by Nana being teased in everything magic and unnatural and ridiculous and not real and Santa Clause and bunny rabbits for Easter overlapped with serious religious training right from the start. 

My mom said she has eyes in the back of her head.

Now see, that's just flat lying.  

Dr. Freud, my mom f'd with my head.

Nobody really likes sunny side up eggs. Do you know why? 

Albumen comes in two types, when the thin part cooks and yolk begins to turn the thicker type white nearest the yolk is unfinished and remains like ... um ... snot. That's why.

Know how to avoid that?

Poke holes in it with your spatula so steam passes through from the bottom. A few holes causes it to cook faster enabling you to save the yolk from destruction. 

Poke poke poke, pokey poke poke. Problem solved.

I didn't do that and the snot part really is gross.