Homemade mustard

dear chip this is god other people like this twice as much as you do so give at least half of it away

dear god this is chip the mustard guy just to be clear tell me why

dear chip this is god again i already told you why so now additionally show the people how and besides because i said so

they don't listen anyway

i heard that 

All that to show one little tin of mustard powder mixed with enough vinegar to moisten, activate, and form a thick mustard paste. Then enough water to thin to a reasonable consistency. That's how I did it. I don't know what experts do.

You're supposed to notice how it changes. 

I imagine experts mix it with all kind of things and probably use Champaign vinegar or something, but I tell you what, this is so extreme and so complex and so awesome by itself that any addition to it is superfluous, why, it would be as if to gold plate something already solid gold, it would be, yes, the same thing as painting a lily all fancy or dropping a bouquet of flowers into a vat of Avon or something like that, it would be like running a Zamboni over an ice rink an extra time to get it to be a little more smooth. Oh Man, I'm having an incredible hit of that déjà vu thing all over the place.