Popcorn


Popped corn, the best in the galaxy. No brag, just fact.

I saw it all in a dream:  I'm greeted in heaven by a group of beings of the Melchizedek Order. They weren't even old looking.  The one in front goes, "Glad to see you make it, Chip, although we feel regret about the whole white-water rafting thing." And I go, "Thanks. Appreciate that." Then the guy goes, "Before we get started on your beginner classes, mind if you whip us out a batch of that popcorn for which you're famed?"  This was confusing to me because it did not comport with my expectations, and I go, "Huh? What? Beg your pardon. " And he goes, "You know what I'm talkin' 'bout. The popcorn. The POPCORN, Boy." And I go, "But, but, but, how can it be thou partaketh of mortal food in this spiritual realm? Doth thou not partaketh of the tree of life?" And they all go, "Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. You loon."  I never did make the popcorn in the dream because without a pantry I couldn't fathom where to get corn kernels and curry powder and butter.  But that tells me, this is the best popcorn in the galaxy.

Things happen quickly. Best to have everything ready mise en place


1/2 cup kernels (slightly less, actually) works perfectly for the heavy pot I use.

Grated Parmigiano with sea salt. To finish, the cheese delivers the salt, the butter delivers the spice.


The real stuff, not the fake stuff marketed as Parmesan as if that could fool us, and I suppose it does fool some of us. My own family *hangs head* refuses to appreciate the clear superiority of the real thing and they persist in using those ersatz frauds. But I still love them anyway through these trials and in spite of this most grievous shortcoming. In fact, I even ate some without complaining just to fit in. But I couldn't believe they choose to ignore my sagacious steady pontification this whole time. Pfffft.

Anyway, the kernels are heated in olive oil just below the smoking point. McGee writes if the kernels are heated too quickly the insides do not expand properly. They need a little time. He's very technical in his description of what's going on inside the kernels. I had been blasting them on HIGH so I stopped doing that after reading McGee. I also stopped using a lid on the pot because McGee said that traps moisture released by the kernels which makes them soggy. Screen for crispy popped kernels. Plus you get to watch what's going on inside the pot.


You'll notice the lids on the poppers at the movie theaters are loose flaps that open fully as the popcorn bursts out.  This pot with a screen is much better than the popcorn popper I bought on Amazon. I think I'll give that thing away. It was just an experiment anyway, and it failed.

Butter ready with curry and cayenne.


Melted in the pot off the heat but still hot from the popcorn, then drizzled over the cooked popcorn. The sizzling butter cooks the spices briefly which is better than sprinkling the spices  raw over the buttered popcorn. You know how Indians from the subcontinent heat ground seeds that comprise various curries, often unique to each household, before adding the vegetables and everything else. This emulates that. Except here prepared curry is used and that would be unacceptable to authentic Indian cook. But hey, it's popcorn, ah'ight? And I'm American, whadjew expect?

3 comments:

JAL said...

OK Chipper -- when is the parmesian (the real stuff) and sea salt added?

I think you have made popcorn into our favorite snack without even having made it yet.

Chip Ahoy said...

Grated cheese and salt added last so it sticks to the butter.

Notice the kernels are cooked in oil, here olive oil, then butter to finish. So there's a double whammy of oil. This bothers some dieters, I imagine, but it's what I live for.

Dust Bunny Queen said...

I use a Theater II type of popcorn popper with the whirley crank action. I've had this one for 15 years and it replaced the last one that I had for about the same time. Has the flaps that open up as the popcorn reaches critical mass.

Peanut oil!! Orville Redenbacher kernels kept in the freezer until just ready to use. Kosher salt and of course BUTTER. I find the kosher salt sticks much better than other salts.

I agree the heat shouldn't be too hot....not too cold...Juuuuuust right.

I have used garlic salt and sometimes fresh ground pepper, but not fresh grated Parmesan or Romano....must do the next time!!!

You can also make salty caramel corn in one of these types of poppers but a real pain in the rear to clean up.

Nom nomnomm

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