Double Fail: coconut water and cream, blueberries

The intention was to blend young coconut water with its scant underdeveloped copra with blueberries. But weirdly the copra was brown, not white.

The soft white coating inside was light brown and so was the water. It tasted okay but the color put me off.

So I opened a regular old coconut. 

This coconut split open with one bash with a hammer but not across the equator. Even with proper tools it was a sumna bitch to extract from its shell.

Processing the white through the juicer was extremely problematic. The fat collects on the grinder wheel and clogs it up, visible through the window. Processing with cold water makes the situation worse because it hardens the fat.

I should have just eaten this whole carton of blueberries. There'd have been a lot less waste.

It cannot be made cold. The large amount of fat simply does not cooperate.

And you cannot blend in the fat or else it tastes like soap.

I drank half this then gave up messing with it. It was mostly a waste. The fat at the top was lifted out and discarded and only half the remainder was consumed. The whole thing is gross.

Are my teeth purple?

*brushes teeth*

You know what?

I think I'll open another coconut and make an intensely coconut cake. By using both water and copra, and with all that coconut fat, and copra that is not desiccated, and used in both cake and icing, it'll be the most coconut-y cake ever.