Chicken thigh, toast, watermelon, lettuce

Partially thawed. Four thighs were removed, repackaged and returned to the refrigerator to thaw slowly overnight. Eight thighs were returned to the freezer in two freezer packages. So that's what, twelve thighs right there.

The idea is to make a chicken sandwich on English muffin type bread.

     So how did it go?

Cheese soufflé

I just now ate six eggs and two blocks of cheese.

But only one raspberry. Those things are awful. Old. Frozen. The rest were tossed. 

I smelled the soufflé when it was cooking and that told me it's done. Then I really smelled it hard and that told me it's overdone. I opened the oven door and the soufflé had already collapsed.

I never did care much for foam-food. That's why I don't make many soufflés. But collapsed soufflés are more compressed and that is better. I loved eating this. It disappeared in my mouth without stuffing my estómago. I kept going and going and the flavorful near-foam kept passing effortlessly through my mouth over my tongue down my esophagus and into my stomach like feathers that had fallen from above and landed one-by-one in a barren desert landscape and disappeared. 

I am a snake that ate six eggs and doesn't feel any different, except satisfied.

I weighed myself yesterday, 153 lbs. 

This is three pounds heavier than my imagined ideal weight when I was 21 years-of-age to age sixty-four. When my homeostasis weight is 148 lbs. 

See, I wanted to be 6 feet tall and 150 pounds weight. Nice round numbers in these two arbitrary numbering systems. Silly, I know that, but sometimes I'm silly. 

But I am looser now than then. Back then I was tight as a catapult. Now my body is loose. Although slimmed down drastically, the remaining weight has some measure of fat. My body previous to kidney failure had near zero fat. This tells me my musculature has diminished discouragingly. I cannot do all the things that I did.

Salmon in savory whipped cream, wakame salad

I know, right? It's weird. It's so weird that I couldn't find anything in YouTube that covers it.

Shrimp and vegetables with rice

I thought to myself, "make me something delicious from this."

I thought about this sort of reflexive thinking and answered myself, "Ah-aight."

Hoisin sauce and soy sauce with a lacing of apple cider vinegar.

     What is a lacing?

Lacing is where you take a teaspoon of something and pull it around like a sled over the top of something else, a bit carelessly, a bit splashy, to get drops of vinegar to deposit around randomly.

I just made that up. Lacing. That's ridiculous. But that's what I did so I found a word for it. Just put your thumb over the top of the bottle to control how much you sprinkle around. I want the vinegar separated so its not in every bite.

The rice is the kind with the germ still in it. I love that stuff. 

Hoisin sauce is extremely flavorful and sweet, all with high flavor notes, soy sauce to balance with salt and with body. The liquid is very good tasting. Almost half of the sauce was wasted.

And that's tragic!

I cleaned the plate save for a few streaks. To get it cleaner I'd have to lick the plate like a dog. 

Or I could just wash it.

Salmon, broccoli, carrot

The piece of salmon is really thin. All the pieces of salmon are this thin, individually wrapped in the large bag. It's just such a bummer having all these thin tail pieces. It never occurred to me that such an abuse of customer trust was possible but now I know to look out. I would have seen that in the store. This was delivered. Whole Foods. 

This makes the skin maximum importance.

A Japanese restaurant in town, Genroku, had salmon skin on their menu.

One time I went in there and I saw a Japanese woman eating it. With chopsticks, putting bits of seared salmon skin in her mouth. And I thought, "Man, that's weird." It's actually a thing. She actually ordered salmon skin. 

And ever since then I've looked at fish skin differently.

I never cut it off and throw it away. That's just stupid. I saw Jacques Pépin do that this week in a video and I'm sitting here yelling at my laptop, what a waster. Then the whole rest of the time I'm talking back using Jacques Pépin's voice. I press my tongue to the top of my mouth and suck air through the corners of my distorted mouth shape to produce sucking slobbering sounds incorporated into speech. Long ones. Long sucking sounds made while hanging your head over raw food. And I go "u-h-h-h" a lot very low voice so that the accumulative effect is a pond of bullfrogs. So, slobber sucking pond of bullfrogs. If you were to walk in a grown 65+ year old man imitating Jacques Pépin you'd either be appalled at me for being so retarded, or join in. And that's why so many of my friends are goofballs like myself that find joining irresistible so it's at least three of us talking like Jacques Pépin, including the real Jacques Pépin. 

And it forces me to visualize the fish skin being the fish-produced material that separates the fish from the water while blending the fish into it. I see the fish moving through water, but seeing it at the point of these layers. I have this dividing material too, this same outermost all-encompassing body organ. I am eating the dividing material and the inner material of the tail of this salmon and it's kind of blowing my mind as I see these fish layers living and working and then here I am eating it. 

After searing it. Just to show how weird we are.

I seared dead fish skin then ate it. 

I must say, it's delicious.


Darn, out of focus. I should have pushed the table away a few inches. The lens goes, "A million focal points, then one focal point." I think that means it's too close.

Bacon and egg

Mmm, muy delicioso. 

The taste of the bacon is still in my mouth. It's coming out of nooks and crannies in there. If I would brush my teeth it would erase the whole thing and there would go all the fun. Man, that bacon is good.

I thought it was two frozen slices but it turned out to be three and I was all, "Oh my God, it's Thanksgiving all over again over here." 

The sauce is very good. You should buy some. It's expensive but what the heck, you only live, what, a couple of times. 

Whipped cream, blueberries, pineapple

It's dessert for breakfast. 

Maybe I'll have an egg later. 

Maybe I'll have some bacon.

Hamburger patty, lettuce, pineapple

That looks familiar. 

I had to do something with the hamburger. 

Get out. I'm trying to sleep over here. Promise I won't waste it. 

Pizza, pineapple with jalapeño and hamburger meat

At this mid-point of topping the pizza is a cheeseburger with top cheeses. 

The dough was fantastic. 

I did the preliminary thing before kneading with a plate over the glass bowl.

Removed the plate and dough had risen. Removed the dough without knocking or punching, and kneaded the dough but nothing happened. The dough had kneaded itself. The bowl was upturned over the dough and it rose again incredibly fast. The dough expanded to the edges of the bowl dome.

It was loose as any piece of dough I ever handled. 

The top was oiled, which is actually the bottom, and flipped. Now the bottom is oiled heavily, the actual top. The dough stretches incredibly easily. The top is oiled again. The dough continues to rise in a flattened and stretched shape as ingredients are prepared to top it. 

Fresh pineapple, blueberries, whipped cream

Whipped cream on the bottom.

Man, this whipped cream is really good too. 

If those cows knew what we get up to with their milk they'd probably be discouraged with us. We're playing with the food they provide us. They would not understand all our messing around. We're deadly serious about playing with our food making milkshakes and popsicles, whipping their cream and blasting it into coffee and onto hot chocolate, making ice cream and forming little Eskimo sandwiches out of it. We smear their butter on our toast. Then smear it again with fruit preserves. We're insane. 

Then you die and go to heaven and talk to God and he tells you, "Man, that was a good one. That thing that you guys did with those cows. You cultured their milk and made all kinds of stuff out of it. You whipped up their cream and put it on pies! You're insane. All the things that you did with that milk is just incredible. I did not anticipate all of that. You little cheesemakers amaze me. 


I saw it all coming. I just wanted to live it, and I just couldn't believe you would actually create full industries out of this. You took it all a lot farther than reason. You crackpots really are crazy.

And there is no end to your insanity. You keep adding onto it. Each year you contrive new things to do with cow's milk and with new ways to do them. You maniacs grew them much larger than sensible. Now they are handicapped living walking milk-producing udders with smaller cows attached to them, barely able to carry themselves to be milked. You did that through maniacal obsession. And that's why I love you. You goofballs are the best.

     Some people do! The real people keep it real.

Miso soup in bonito/kombu dashi with tofu and shrimp

Ham sandwich

I took one bite out of each one of these segments and that will just have to do.

Potato salad with deli ham

Yay! I have a whole sack of potatoes.

Just sitting there waiting to be turned into something great.

Yesterday a site that I visit put up a map of Idaho with text reading Montana's western border looks like Joe Biden creeping on Idaho.

Oh yeah? Well, Colorado's borders all look like straight lines.

Can you even be more arbitrary?

I am not the slightest bit hungry but I am eating this anyway.

What the heck. 

I am a lot more comfortable empty than I am full. 

But I lost twenty-six pounds in the last two months. 

So that's what, thirteen pounds a month.

Safe enough, I suppose, but within a month I am going to have to start eating a lot more, uncomfortable or not.

So having eaten this right this moment I feel great. Soon, every single internal motion will send me flying to the bathroom. It's pretty good exercise, actually. How to go from horizontal and sleeping to vertical and moving in two seconds flat. 

"So, tell us, what inspired you to become a quick-change artist?" 

     "It goes way back to this thing I picked up." 

"What did you pick up, a book?" 

     "A condition by which I must rip off my clothes fifteen times a day quickly as possible." 

"That sounds like a handy skill." 

     "You end up with clothing all over the place." 

I could have used cucumbers. I could have used zucchini. I could have a used a vinaigrette and I was thinking about cheese. I have two small sacks of Italian tomatoes. I came this close:
--->| |<---
to adding Swiss chard. I have apples and celery. I also have olives. I have a boat-load of broccoli and I even thought of adding wakame seaweed and pecans. But I kept it simple. Now see, all that combined restraint is what makes me so muh-chur. 

I love the way Japanese returned the potato salad. Fusion cuisine right there. Yoshoku. Western-influenced Japanese food that originated during the Meiji Restoration. When you look online at videos they're all exactly the same with the same techniques of salting the onions and cucumbers, then rinsing and drying them separately, the same sandwich ham, the same mayonnaise. 

"How do you guys keep it all together like that?" 

     "Oh, we live on separate islands. Everyone does it differently." 

"They look all the same to me." 

     "Honshu use 1/4 cup onion, Hokkaido use 1/2 cup onion. Honshu use 2 carrot, Kyushu use 1 carrot. Shikoku adds peas, Okinawa no peas." 

"Oh. So they're all different." 

     "Yes. Different." 

"Within their own little world."  


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