Health Food juices


"I would like your stupidest, sugariest, least healthy four choices please." This is a ridiculous thing to ask in a place that prides itself on healthy choices. The woman looked a bit perplexed where to start with me, certainly not contradictorily. How can she steer me aright?

     "All of our juices are healthy."

"I have the tastebuds of a child. I crave sweet sugary things." 

     "Oh, I know. I sympathize."

"Actually, I think that I've tried everything in your case except for those white things, and I've liked everything that I've tried. Even the ones with kale. But I am most suspicious of green ones that aren't sweet, and I'm pretty open to everything else. Whoever invented these recipes is genius."

     "Thank you. That is my son, Christian." 

"Your son is brilliant. I am a good cook myself. And your son's juices caused me to buy a very good juicer. Top end. But every juice that I've tasted from your son's recipes is better than everything that I made for myself with my juicer. I've made very good juice combinations. But your son's recipes are reliably better."

     "Thank you for saying that. We taught him that with Jack Lalanne juicer way before juicing was popular. He grew up with all this and made it his own."

"Please tell him that I said 'thank you.' And thank you for staying open during shutdown. It would have been easy to just close." 

This woman is extremely proud of her son. I've already met his girlfriends. Apparently everyone that he knows works at one of his three stores. What I was saying was music to this proud mum's ears. She is very happy with the way her son turned out, happy to work with him, and very happy to have his genius acknowledged. 





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